Outside of the obvious monotony of the season, I have my reasons to hate the holidays. I call it the curse of being born on the day after Christmas. Thus, celebrating my introduction to the world was always overshadowed by traveling hangovers and shopping binges. Luckily, over the years, I’ve become more apathetic than angry about it. Right. That’s it. I swear.

Anyway, while composing some twisted takes on holiday music for this podcast, I was visited by the Ghost of Podcast Past. He tried to steer me towards a more positive attitude about the holidays. Unfortunately, he failed. The subsequent result was Magic Junk Radio 4: Holiday Complex.

If you’ve haven’t tuned in before, MJR can best be described as an eclectic maelstrom of sounds, voices and samples. #4 jumps around through musical genres, as I decide holiday music should have no limits, but still keeping an ear to the past. It clocks in at a jolly ol’ 20:19— with some funk grooves, mellow jams, a little hip-hop, electronica, rock, and even a laid-back acoustic jam. As always, some of it was meant to be intentionally funny. But since my ego is already scarred, I don’t have to tell you which parts. All jokes aside, try to enjoy the rest of the season as best you can. It’s not always ideal, but effort goes a long way— even for cynical arrogant bastards. Cheers.

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[ Download the MP3 ] – 19 MB

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INSTRUCTIONS: Right-click the MP3 link above to download the full podcast in MP3 format, which will play in any iPod or MP3 music player. Left click and the MP3 will begin playing in a new web browser window (unless you haven’t updated in a while.)

MJR 4 Content of Tables:

1. Holiday Mission 1:53
2. Intro 1:20
3. Red Nose Funk 2:02
4. Time For Balance 0:49
5. Traveling Sucks 2:20
6. What Else? 1:10
7. How The Pimp Stole XXXmas 3:00
8. Walking In Fresh Snow 2:45
9. The 12-24 Panic Shop 1:49
10. That Lady O’ Mine 2:08
11. Farewell 0:52

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Love it? Hate it? Confused?
Let me know. Leave a comment below.

 Magic Junk Radio 4: Holiday Complex [20:19] Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

By making a 3rd installment of Magic Junk Radio, I’ve now officially committed myself to podcasting. After all, one or two episodes could be explained as a happy accident or a fluke. But with three, I’m out of excuses until I reach at least seven or so. Oh my dear black star in the sky, what have I gotten myself into?

Commitment (in one way or another) seems to be a recurring theme for me though. Since Magic Junk Radio 3 is subtitled “The Bachelor Must Die,” you could say it’s art imitating life. Yes, it is my own bachelorhood that will be getting the axe, as I’m getting married this weekend. *insert sound here of Shaggy and Scooby going “Gulp!” with dramatic fear* But it’s all good.

Anyway, MJR 3 is our first voyage into a ‘concept’ podcast. So I hope that can be the Jell-O mold for future shows, since it would help maintain my severely fractured focus. At least, that’s the pipe dream I’m smoking right now. But it sure sounds inspirational, so I’ll stick with it.

If you’ve haven’t tuned in before, MJR can best be described as an eclectic maelstrom of sounds, voices and samples. #3 is a little tighter musically than its predecessors, and clocks in at a respectable 18:23— with a heavy dose of electronica, some rock, new jazz, and even a 1970′s-style power ballad! (yes, it’s meant to be intentionally funny) If that isn’t proof I’m subconsciously suffering from wedding stress, then I don’t know what could be. Cheers.

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[ Subscribe to the RSS feed ]
[ Download the MP3 ] – 16.8 MB

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INSTRUCTIONS: Right-click the MP3 link above to download the full podcast in MP3 format, which will play in any iPod or MP3 music player. Left click and the MP3 will begin playing in a new web browser window (unless you haven’t updated in a while.)

MJR 3 Content of Tables:

1. Perform and Restore 0:31
2. My One Ring 1:58
3. Distress Call 0:47
4. The Bachelor Must Die 2:24
5. Too Much Too Late 4:02
6. Who’s Your Master? 0:33
7. Nothing But The Past 2:43
8. Honeymoon Cruise 3:05
9. The Six Month Panic 2:12

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Love it? Hate it? Confused? Getting hitched too?
Let me know. Leave a comment below. A horse called Joe. Hustle and flow.

Missed the first two episodes of Magic Junk Radio? For shame! Fear not, you may redeem yourself by going here and here.

 Magic Junk Radio 3:The Bachelor Must Die [18:23] Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Okay, okay. I know I said Magic Junk Radio was an experiment, just a one-time creative crossover from a non-musician. But in pushing my limited skills to make the first MJR, I found I really enjoyed the process. The beauty of being creative, for me, is that I find things in myself that I didn’t realize were there. Thus, it was worth it to create a sequel. Composition is king, and I gladly bow before it.

Magic Junk Radio 2 is subtitled “Humble As Ever”, since I make no boasts, no sales pitches, and no long winded soliloquies on the state of the world. It really is just an eclectic maelstrom of sounds, voices, and samples. Some parts might make you laugh, tap your foot, bob your head, cry, fear for my mental stability—whatever. In the words of the long lost Sugar Smacks Frog, just “dig ‘em.” Like its predecessor, MJR 2 is a fast food podcast (now with appetizers and dessert), clocking in at just under 26 minutes.

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[ Subscribe to the RSS feed ]
[ Download the MP3 ] – 24.3 MB

Missed the first Magic Junk Radio? Go here.

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INSTRUCTIONS: Right-click the MP3 link above to download the full podcast in MP3 format, which will play in any iPod or MP3 music player. Left click and the MP3 will begin playing in a new web browser window (unless you haven’t updated in a while.)

MJR 2 Content of Tables:

1. A Phone Call – 1:08
2. Intro Theme – 0:55
3. Welcome – 0:51
4. Eclectic Maelstrom – 1:31
5. Cubicle Song – 2:39
6. Interlude 1 – 1:10
7. Where I Was Not – 2:33
8. Tech-Noir – 2:01
9. Interlude 2 – 1:28
10. Absence of Movement – 2:36
11. The Deadliest Kind – 2:36
12. Interlude 3 – 1:04
13. The Puertoruvian – 1:57
14. Imperial Remix – 2:29
15. Farewell – 0:43

 Magic Junk Radio 2: Humble As Ever Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

While all of my tracks are really B-sides in a way, I designated a specific track for a multi-person podcast created by Temple Stark from Blogcritics.org. Since the track fell between MJR 1 and 2, it subsequently became a B-side. Go to blogcritics.org to check out the inaugural Blogcritics podcast.

The track is called ‘A Place To Write’ – 1:18.

Just in case you were curious: while Temple loosely defined the track as my “relationship with Blogcritics”, or that I… “leave my writing to your imagination”, that’s about half-right. Those original lyrics were written in November 2002 on a notepad, while I was waiting for friends in Penn Station, NYC. Obviously, at the time, I had nowhere to write. When I caught Temple’s message asking for submissions, I thought this one fit my time at Blogcritics, since for the past 6 months I’ve been posting, BC has given me ‘a place to write’. For that, I am grateful, and tip my astral hat.

Here’s the complete blurb from 11/23/02:
A place to write, a flat surface upon which I scribble away the secrets of the universe, an etching of my meticulous nature in the dead wood of a tree once planted by an undisturbed acorn. A place to write my bible, where thousands of idiots will pray to the composition they can never hope to understand. A place to write is where I fight my war, a pen is my sword, and I shall off every last head of my enemies. Every last one.

 A Magic Junk Radio B-Side - A Place to Write [1:18] Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Among the creative people of the world, there are many who dare to crossover. Those who try their hands at genres within the arts that they were not instructed on, or gained their fame in. Just think of actors like J.Lo or William Shatner who have made music albums, while inversely musicians such as LL Cool J or Roger Daltrey have appeared in movies. When celebrities do a crossover, it’s essentially a crapshoot in terms of marketing. While the general public knows the name of the performer immediately, it is difficult to accept a celebrity doing something different.

For those of us fortunate enough to be devoid of fame, we can try any and everything we want within the creative hemispheres, and suffer all the same. How gratifying! Nevertheless, the creative area that I have no formal training or experience is music. I love hearing music, and am constantly surrounded by it no matter what I am doing. But when it comes to actually composing or playing the music, I have mostly avoided it for lack of natural talent and coordination. My encounters with playing are limited to three months of saxophone lessons in fourth grade, and a brief stint of singing terribly in a tenth grade rock band, to which I got kicked out of at the end of the summer. Of course, I know wholeheartedly that I did not apply myself in either case. But redemption was always waiting for me.

By admitting that I am a writer and artist first, that puts a big scarlet C for crossover on my chest when it comes to me producing a podcast of semi-melodic tracks. But brand me all you want— producing compositions of words and sounds was as fun as new Christmas toys. For all of the tweaking and timing issues and triple takes that it took to make it happen, I highly recommend it to any creative soul looking for something fun and challenging to do.

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Magic Junk Radio 1 is a creative fusion of spoken word, samples, sounds, and beats. I didn’t play any instruments, but you’re welcome to pretend I did. MJR 1 has no aspirations other than amusement and an occasional foot tap. At 17 and a half minutes, it’s a fast food podcast. But I’m perfectly content with that. Clog your arteries and enjoy.

INSTRUCTIONS: Right-click this link to download the full podcast in MP3 format, which will play in any iPod or MP3 music player. Left click and the MP3 will begin playing in a new web browser window (unless you haven’t updated in a while.)

MJR 1 Content of Tables:

1. Intro Music – 0:51
2. Welcome – 1:18
3. Identifying the Train People – 4:53
4. Interlude 1 – 1:12
5. Serico’s Wake Up Call (from The Art of Getting Bent) – 2:02
6. Not Going Gently – 1:51
7. Interlude 2 – 1:14
8. Magically Delicious – 1:40
9. Mushroom Cloud – 1:52
10. Farewell – 0:37

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 Magic Junk Radio 1: A Creative Crossover Play Now | Play in Popup | Download